They say that is the only way of living..the best way...I disagree.I don't intend to be the rebel child, not anymore but guess I just lost the way back.
No matter how much I want to keep in touch with my past, it is downright irrelevant. I don't know where from all these prejudices; issues have cropped up-- but they are all uninvited yet inevitable.
I don't belong to anything,anymore ,anywhere. Neither do I want to. I do not want to buy the best house and the best paying job. I don't want to be bankrupt, workless, homeless as well. All I really want is a house that suits me, a job that defines me. I used to like travelling before but even that is sold out. "travel" has become a commodity. Thank God! there are still certain things personal...like cooking for a dear one or for yourself..like reading a book, the newspaper, petting, having a heart to heart conversation, stitching, writing--yes good options. Rest is all commercialised- "status", "marriage", "relationships", "socialising/having fun"-- thank god I am not a part of any of these..
In my earlier article I wrote about my concerns going beyond the obvious; towards the more intangible issues like self evolution and social acknowledgement. Self evolution part is fine. But social acknowledgement ..can I define it first? I can't do without it entirely nor deal with it.Hypothetically, this isn't the society I want to belong to. Or should i accept society with its imperfections? Do I have the option to choose my society? Whose acknowledgement am I seeking if the base itself is not strong enough? I don't mean to rebel against existing perceptions neither do I need to be a part of it/accept it.
So at times self evolutions is in diect contrast with seeking social acknowledgement. I still am not sure which is a greater cause--- me as an individual or me as a part of a community?
Bye for now
8th July 2012
2:00 a.m.
No matter how much I want to keep in touch with my past, it is downright irrelevant. I don't know where from all these prejudices; issues have cropped up-- but they are all uninvited yet inevitable.
I don't belong to anything,anymore ,anywhere. Neither do I want to. I do not want to buy the best house and the best paying job. I don't want to be bankrupt, workless, homeless as well. All I really want is a house that suits me, a job that defines me. I used to like travelling before but even that is sold out. "travel" has become a commodity. Thank God! there are still certain things personal...like cooking for a dear one or for yourself..like reading a book, the newspaper, petting, having a heart to heart conversation, stitching, writing--yes good options. Rest is all commercialised- "status", "marriage", "relationships", "socialising/having fun"-- thank god I am not a part of any of these..
In my earlier article I wrote about my concerns going beyond the obvious; towards the more intangible issues like self evolution and social acknowledgement. Self evolution part is fine. But social acknowledgement ..can I define it first? I can't do without it entirely nor deal with it.Hypothetically, this isn't the society I want to belong to. Or should i accept society with its imperfections? Do I have the option to choose my society? Whose acknowledgement am I seeking if the base itself is not strong enough? I don't mean to rebel against existing perceptions neither do I need to be a part of it/accept it.
So at times self evolutions is in diect contrast with seeking social acknowledgement. I still am not sure which is a greater cause--- me as an individual or me as a part of a community?
Bye for now
8th July 2012
2:00 a.m.
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